Friday, October 23, 2009

Elephant

Large in its grotesque dark silence
… it waits in the room
My attempts to get away …
trapped under sandbags of futility…
Fleeing from it an exercise of the impossible
In silence my fate resigned
For it follows me you see

Even escaping the confines
Of the suffocating...
shrinking walls of my prison
I can count on it to …
remain two steps behind

Stealing away in my shadow
It follows … faithfully …. no …
spitefully … in it’s malice its bound to me
and me to it

And turning around …
almost in recognition of a familiar face
And see nothing …
an empty nothingness protruding from the silence
a familiar entity …
an ominous presence
Yet I do recognize it ...
before the need to embark
on a journey of painful recollection …
I know
… It’s the elephant in the room

It says nothing …
expects nothing to be said in return
It just waits …
patiently .. reminding me …
constantly reminding me

WHAT DO YOU WANT? …
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO DO?
Say something …
say anything .. please
… dear jesus
I feel my sobs choke halfway up my throat

Will your resolve weaken
Now that your quest is successful
now that we are alone
Just you and me

No …
Now that I am alone
You see … You don’t count
For its solitude you seek
Its solitude you impose
… On me
And you have become
… my self imposed warden

Oh love of my life
Light of my roadway
You are but a memory
In the darkness that envelops me
And as the night of my existence
... embraces me
I await the breaking dawn that never comes

Had we met sooner
Before I was bound to
This entity
Of sorrow and painful regret
Lurking in the shadows
It sits
And waits
It’s waiting still

Waiting for me to finish my writing
To take the last gulp
Of this bitter cup of heartache
And in its predictability
… It offers me a refill


Copyright Johannes Cloete 2009
All rights reserved


Thursday, October 8, 2009

LOVE YOU FOREVER

A mother held her new baby and
very slowly rocked him back and forth,
back and forth, back and forth.
And while she held him, she sang:

I’ll  love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living
my baby you’ll be.

The baby grew.  He grew and he grew
and he grew.  He grew until he
was two years old, and he ran all around
the house.  He pulled all the books
off the shelves.  He pulled all the food
out of the refrigerator and he took his
mother’s watch and flushed it down the
toilet.  Sometimes his mother would say,
“This kid is driving me CRAZY!”

But at night time, when that two-year-old
was quiet, she opened the door
to his room, crawled across the floor,
looked up over the side of his bed;
and if he was really asleep she picked
him up and rocked him back and forth,
back and forth, back and forth.
While she rocked him she sang:

I’ll  love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living
my baby you’ll be.

The little boy grew.  He grew and he grew
and he grew.  He grew until he was nine
years old.  And he never wanted to come
in for dinner, he never wanted to take a bath,
and when grandma visited he always
said bad words.  Sometimes his mother
wanted to sell him to the zoo!

But at night time, when he was
asleep, the mother quietly opened the
door to his room, crawled across
the floor and looked up over the side of
the bed.  If he was really asleep,
the picked up that nine-year-old boy
and rocked him back and forth,
back and forth, back and forth.
And while she rocked him, she sang:

I’ll  love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living
my baby you’ll be.

The boy grew.  He grew and he
grew and he grew.  He grew until he was
a teenager.  He had strange friends
and he wore strange clothes and he
listened to strange music.
Sometimes the mother felt like she
Was in a zoo!

But at night time, when that teenager
was asleep, the mother opened the door
to his room, crawled across the
floor and looked up over the side
of the bed.  If he was really asleep she
picked up that great big boy and rocked
him back and forth, back and forth,
back and forth.
While she rocked him she sang:

I’ll  love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living
my baby you’ll be.

That teenager grew.  He grew and he
grew and he grew.  He grew until
he was a grown-up man.  He left home
and got a house across town.

But sometimes on dark nights
the mother got into her car and drove
across town.

If all the lights in her son’s house
were out, she opened his bedroom
window, crawled across the floor,
and looked up over the side of his bed.
If that great big man was really
asleep she picked him up and rocked
him back and forth, back and forth,
back and forth.
And while she rocked him she sang:

I’ll  love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living
my baby you’ll be.

Well, that mother, she got older.
She got older and older and older.
One day she called up her son and said,
“You’d better come see me because
I’m very old and sick.”
So her son came to see her.
When he came in the door she tried
to sing the song.  She sang:

I’ll love you forever,
I’ll like you for always ...

But she couldn’t finish because she
was too old and sick.

The son went to his mother.
He picked her up and rocked her
back and forth, back and forth,
back and forth.
And he sang this song:

I’ll  love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living
my Mommy you’ll be.

When the son came home that night,
he stood for a long time
at the top of the stairs.

Then he went into the room
where his very new baby daughter
was sleeping.  He picked her up in
his arms and very slowly rocked
her back and forth, back and forth,
back and forth.
And while he rocked her he sang.

I’ll  love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living
my baby you’ll be.

Robert Munsch 1945